Wednesday, September 7, 2011

THOSE are your worse songs of the 90's? HAH!

So yeah, Rolling Stone had a list of the worse songs of the 90's. I don't agree with half of them. Why? Because most of them were not so much lousy songs, but songs that were overplayed to death. Ok, I think Achy Breaky Heart and Who Let The Dogs Out deserve their place, as well as BArbie Girl. But What's Up? Really? What's up with that? I thought that's a pretty good song. And what's wrong with Tubthumping? Damn uptight Americans.

Anyway, here are MY personal worse songs of the 90's:

1) Mambo #5 (Lou Bega) - Once, the office decided that it would be a good idea to pipe in MixFM on the PA. It was tolerable at first. Then... THIS song came on. I think half the office wanted to commit mass suicide by jumping off the building at that point.

2) Barbie Girl (Aqua) - Ok, this is one choice I actually agree with. It's the most annoying song ever, with the most stupid lyrics and sung in the most annoying high pitch voice EVER. AQUA MUST DIE.

3) The First Time (Surface) - The first time I heard this song, I wanted to punch the face of the singer. Then the video came out and I wanted to chop him into little pieces THEN punch him in the face.

4) With Arms Wide Open (Creed) - Good bands don't let their frontmen yarl.

5) Blue (Eiffel 65) - I'm blue, badadibadibagaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah

6) Rico Suave (Gerardo) - Ale alele! Riiicooo... SUAVSHHHADAAAAP.

7) Amazed (Lonestar) - Before Lady Antebellum, there was Lonestar, pioneer of boring, unimaginative, wholesome 'country' sickness.

8) Honey (Mariah Carey) - I actually liked Mariah at one point, when her hair was still curly and before she started looking like a sex-crazed slut. This album was for me, the one where she started completely annoying me, and on this song in particular... DOES SHE EVEN SING? What does she do beyond all that YODELLING???

9) You Are Not Alone (Michael Jackson) - Sorry, Jacko fans. Everytime I see or hear this come on on the TV or radio, I just turned it off so I could be alone.

10) I Believe I Can Fly (R. Kelly) - The only version of this song I could stand was the one FlyGuy came up with during his Breakfast Show (back when HitzFM was still tolerable), which went: I believe I can flyyy... I believe I can grow an eyeee...

---------------------------------------------------------

SPECIAL MENTION:

Almost EVERY fucking song by Michael Learns to Rock Deserves a place on this list. In fact I could have populated the ENTIRE LIST with songs from that fucking band, but I didn't think about it until KY pointed it out on Twitter AFTER I'd posted this list. So, what's the WORSE EVER Michael Learns to Rock song? The idiotically retarded lyrics of The Actor is a close second, the grammatically incorrect That's Why You Go Away is also close, but the WORSE MLTR SONG EVER IMHO is...

PAINT MY LOVE.

Everytime I hear that fucking song, I imagine paint on the walls curling up in protest, or just turning into flakes and flying away just to get away from the song. It's got a fucking boring verse, and the bloody chorus just makes my ears bleed. WHY THE HELL IS THIS SONG AND BAND SO POPULAR IN MALAYSIA? It's a fucking insult to my name, it is...

No comments:

Post a Comment